Like any self-serious blogger and dedicated egotist, I spend a good deal of time Googling myself – sort of the writerly equivalent of admiring one’s abs in the mirror. I also study my blog stats like a Talmudic scholar, to determine, for example, how many of a given day’s 72 visitors might have originated from the U.S. American zip code 11204, which 100% of my closest relations call home.
The modest WordPress tracker – sort of the Li’l Stat Counter That Could – also offers a breakdown of the most recent web searches that led readers to my blog. This is both revealing and frightening. While even a casual visitor can appreciate why “burundi,” “february 2010 burundi coup plot,” and “burundi civil war” might appear in a recent list of top searches, one struggles to say the same for such popular searches as “black african [sic] women shitting outside” and “saddam hussain [sic] girls tree stump.”
For the record, not once in the brief and modest history of this blog has there been so much as a passing reference to “black african [sic] women shitting outside” – or inside, for that matter. Likewise, while I might have some very strong opinions about “saddam hussain [sic],” “girls” and “tree stump[s],” I have yet to compose a Unified Theory that might lead concerned readers to this blog in search of answers to their abstract but no doubt worthy queries.
I do also realize that, by blogging about “black african [sic] women shitting outside” and “saddam hussain [sic] girls tree stump,” I am virtually guaranteeing that future seekers of “black african [sic] women shitting outside” and “saddam hussain [sic] girls tree stump” will be directed to what, from their perspective, will be a very disappointing blog indeed.
To those future readers, I apologize in advance. And to the rest, thank you for your patience.